How things can change very quickly
That is, if you really want them to.
This time two years ago, from March to May 2021, I was in hospital. My life was scattered around me in broken bits that didn’t fit together, and I was somewhere in the middle, unable to catch my breath, unsure of how to resurface.
This time last year, April 2022, I was physically much better, but things still didn’t feel quite right — like I was trying to wear a dress that just wasn’t my fit, but I didn’t know why it was too tight.
At the time, I had an inkling of an idea, along with signs coming at me from every corner. It wasn’t clear yet, but it was forming in my mind piece by piece, while something else was becoming apparent; illustration work, though creative, was not satisfying me. I was building towards a life as a full-time artist, which is what I thought I wanted — to create what and when I choose, but design just wasn’t fulfilling me in the way I’d always thought it would. I hadn’t totally failed but I hadn’t succeeded either, and it felt like a constant battle. Now I know why: my heart just wasn’t in it.
Today, April 2023, my life looks very different. More importantly, it feels very different.
Last week I got back from one month of travelling, in which I barely thought about work, and I didn’t feel guilty about ‘falling behind’. I now trust that I can let things drop, and pick up where I left off when I choose. I know that I don’t have to constantly hustle and market myself, clients and opportunities come and go either way. Honestly, they often come more easily when you’re not desperately trying to find them.
My work now is completely different to twelve months ago. I began my unique portrait experiences last August, and with each one, the offer has evolved. It continues to be the most rewarding work I’ve ever done, and seeing the profound impact it has on my clients never ceases to amaze me.
I have this newsletter which is nourishing and supportive for both me and my readers (so I’m told, and I hope to continue to deliver on that), which I also began less than six months ago. Before that, starting a newsletter felt like a mountain to climb.
What’s more, I was just awarded a fellowship to collaborate with some exceptional female entrepreneurs in Europe and soon have a month-long retreat with them too.
I’m not trying to show off or make it seem like I’ve got it all figured out. I still have far to go in terms of what I’d like to accomplish, and before I can take my foot off the pedal in my business. But my work has dramatically changed in a very short space of time, and with that, my life has transformed for the better too.
Once I stopped listening to what other people told me I should do, I found something aligned to who I am, which allows me to serve others too. It was scary and intimidating at first, but now I owe so much to myself for taking that leap.
Once I surrendered and stopped panicking about where my next client/commission would come from, and let go of control, opportunities flowed in with ease.
Once I slowed down and paid attention to the signs around me, work and life became so much more fun and effortless.
Like I said, less than a year ago, EVERYTHING in my business felt like a battle. A battle to succeed. A battle to get enough sales. A battle to earn even small amounts. A battle to market my products which I didn’t even believe in myself. I wish I’d realised sooner that it wasn’t supposed to feel like that. I wasn’t supposed to be in that fight to begin with.
So if things feel sticky, out of alignment, or if you’re fighting a losing battle, ask yourself Why?
What would you like to change?
What’s standing in your way? Maybe you’re all that’s in the way — we’re usually blocking ourselves so much more than we realise, as our fear of change runs deeper than our craving for it.
Where are you fighting? Could you lay down your weapons and turn in a different direction?
Trust me, it’s worth it.
Hello to everyone new here, thanks so much for joining. Please feel free to comment/reply and tell me a bit about yourself 🥰
Soul Signs — Energy Portrait experience availability:
Over April and May I can take on two new clients, either in-person or remotely via zoom. Get in touch if you’re interested for a chat about the process and see if it’s right for you.
I’m now offering Soul Signs as a fully immersive three-day experience in a location of your choosing. These are pure magic 🎇 I have space for three clients or groups between June and September.
One-off mentoring sessions also on offer between now and mid-May, hit reply to find out more.
I can relate to this so much! Honestly, after becoming unexpectedly pregnant and experiencing the power of yin energy to transform my life, I’m convinced it really doesn’t have to be that hard. There is magic in receptivity, in feeling good, in taking inspired action.
I’m still releasing the external expectations of hustle culture and my own fears/scarcity around not-enoughness but I’m taking it all gently and with a sense of play. Nothing too serious going on here, we’re all just spinning through space on a giant rock together! ☺️