Oh, what lovely timing. I have just properly discovered Lindsay's writing and come here fresh from a delightful comment exchange with her on this topic of stories.
I'm realizing that these things can be true at the same time, that our stories made us who we are and that we don't have to stay stuck in them.
So lovely to hear from you John! How are you? I was thinking of you recently with regard to cycling and cycling accidents... 😂
Yes it is true, becoming aware of them is the first step, and detaching from the ones that are no longer useful to us can be hard work, but so worthwhile.
I'm well, thank you. And you? Fully recovered and back on the bike?
We just had a gathering of cycling advocates last night for a conversation about keeping our island bike friendly in the face of projected population increases.
Many stories are joint stories, and it's easy to get stuck in the dance. We need to be able to release others from the role they played in our story, and we need to claim our freedom from the role we played in theirs.
Quite the opposite in fact, I'd love to be cycling again and I'm missing it terribly. I learnt last week that the hospital completely misdiagnosed me after the accident -- to the tune of broken bones and ruptured ligaments 😂 It has been an interesting few months!
Oh wow, I can imagine the worry with increasing population and what that could mean for your island. I hope the newcomers embrace the bike-friendly atmosphere and that it doesn't get too full of cars...
That's really beautiful, "claim our freedom from the role we played in theirs". Thank you for putting it so well.
Oh, Tamzin, I'm so sorry to hear that. I hope you're on a better path with a good diagnosis and treatment and lots of PT. I can relate in that I'm just getting back to running almost two years after a broken ankle. The surgery damaged a nerve, and it's taken that long for feeling to come back in my toes.
Right now, it's a cyclists' paradise, and yes, we want to keep it that way!
Thanks. I've been turning this over in my head since the first chat with Lindsay. I might have finally found a framing that makes sense!
The patience we need with our bodies sometimes, eh?! I've heard many people mention that full recovery for different injuries really does need two years, which seems so painfully long. I'm glad you have feeling back and I really hope running goes well for you! I'm just hoping now to avoid surgery, and I'm being much more gentle now that I know. I never imagined that I actually had a broken bone that they completely missed, so I kept doing things I shouldn't have been doing, but never mind! We live and learn, and always must listen to our bodies.
Thank you Tamzin for allowing Lindsay to share her story.
I never fully grasped the importance of maternal generational impact until recently, which I find astounding given I have spent my adult life peeling back the layers of self-knowing. This is part of myself I did not want to see. But once we see we cannot unsee.
While I have received many gifts from the women in my family there are a lot of things I need to release. I have work to do but am paying attention to see where their imprint shows up in my life and using my conscious, thinking mind to access the deeper part of me. Those ties that bind are wound tightly within. Thank you Lindsay.
Thank you for sharing this Donna, and I love you put it -- there's space both for the gifts we received and for the things that are not helpful/that we need to release. We can hold it all at the same time... Also, being aware that there are things we can never be fully aware of that have had an impact on us through epi-genetics. It's such a fascinating topic. I never knew any of my grandparents, for example, as they all died before I was born, but I have no doubt that I carry so much from them, from their lives, from their circumstances. Bringing awareness to those parts too that we can't ever know for sure has been really enlightening for me too.
Lindsay, our early trauma experiences - and our reactions to them - are similar. Hyper-vigilance and rescuing was how I coped too. I’ve been excavating my past, and familial patterns etc for five years now. It is important work! Thank you for writing about your experience.
Thank you Susan for sharing this with us. And it is long work, isn't it? Five years and counting, I imagine, but with every layer or story we peel away, we gain such a deeper understanding and joy in life too.
Yes, definitely. Digging deeper to become lighter - lighter in spirit and heart. I said five years, but that's just the latest period, I began excavating my past in my early 20's. It's been a lifetime of work and the work of a lifetime.
Thank you for sharing this. I love Lindsay’s writing, it is always so considered, self-aware, deeply thought-provoking and yet comforting too. Thank you both! xx
I love Lindsay's work around memoir and mental health, so important to give our stories space. Really enjoyed this and totally agree about the benefits of writing and re-shaping the stories we tell ourselves. A powerful practice. A beautiful piece, thank you for giving it space here, Tamzin!
Thanks so much Charlene, it's such a pleasure for me to host fellow writers on here, especially the self-aware, compassionate ones! Really glad you enjoyed the piece 😍
First of all Tamzin, thank you for letting Lindsay share this piece.
There's so much to unpack and reflect on here. I realize that I can't live without my own stories, but at the same time I know that they are not based in any kind of objective reality. That's why when Lindsay wrote "when we are in a story, it can be so hard to see, objectively, whether it’s helping or hindering us" it really struck a chord with me. The narratives that I've told myself have given me purpose and motivation, but at the same time, In retrospect I can also see the pain and suffering that they had inflicted on loved ones.
I know that's a lot to unload here. But stories are very volatile with the potential to both build and destroy. I applaud Lindsay for being able to step outside and reveal both the healing as well as the harm that they are capable of.
Oh, what lovely timing. I have just properly discovered Lindsay's writing and come here fresh from a delightful comment exchange with her on this topic of stories.
I'm realizing that these things can be true at the same time, that our stories made us who we are and that we don't have to stay stuck in them.
So lovely to hear from you John! How are you? I was thinking of you recently with regard to cycling and cycling accidents... 😂
Yes it is true, becoming aware of them is the first step, and detaching from the ones that are no longer useful to us can be hard work, but so worthwhile.
I'm well, thank you. And you? Fully recovered and back on the bike?
We just had a gathering of cycling advocates last night for a conversation about keeping our island bike friendly in the face of projected population increases.
Many stories are joint stories, and it's easy to get stuck in the dance. We need to be able to release others from the role they played in our story, and we need to claim our freedom from the role we played in theirs.
Quite the opposite in fact, I'd love to be cycling again and I'm missing it terribly. I learnt last week that the hospital completely misdiagnosed me after the accident -- to the tune of broken bones and ruptured ligaments 😂 It has been an interesting few months!
Oh wow, I can imagine the worry with increasing population and what that could mean for your island. I hope the newcomers embrace the bike-friendly atmosphere and that it doesn't get too full of cars...
That's really beautiful, "claim our freedom from the role we played in theirs". Thank you for putting it so well.
Oh, Tamzin, I'm so sorry to hear that. I hope you're on a better path with a good diagnosis and treatment and lots of PT. I can relate in that I'm just getting back to running almost two years after a broken ankle. The surgery damaged a nerve, and it's taken that long for feeling to come back in my toes.
Right now, it's a cyclists' paradise, and yes, we want to keep it that way!
Thanks. I've been turning this over in my head since the first chat with Lindsay. I might have finally found a framing that makes sense!
The patience we need with our bodies sometimes, eh?! I've heard many people mention that full recovery for different injuries really does need two years, which seems so painfully long. I'm glad you have feeling back and I really hope running goes well for you! I'm just hoping now to avoid surgery, and I'm being much more gentle now that I know. I never imagined that I actually had a broken bone that they completely missed, so I kept doing things I shouldn't have been doing, but never mind! We live and learn, and always must listen to our bodies.
Thank you Tamzin for allowing Lindsay to share her story.
I never fully grasped the importance of maternal generational impact until recently, which I find astounding given I have spent my adult life peeling back the layers of self-knowing. This is part of myself I did not want to see. But once we see we cannot unsee.
While I have received many gifts from the women in my family there are a lot of things I need to release. I have work to do but am paying attention to see where their imprint shows up in my life and using my conscious, thinking mind to access the deeper part of me. Those ties that bind are wound tightly within. Thank you Lindsay.
Thank you for sharing this Donna, and I love you put it -- there's space both for the gifts we received and for the things that are not helpful/that we need to release. We can hold it all at the same time... Also, being aware that there are things we can never be fully aware of that have had an impact on us through epi-genetics. It's such a fascinating topic. I never knew any of my grandparents, for example, as they all died before I was born, but I have no doubt that I carry so much from them, from their lives, from their circumstances. Bringing awareness to those parts too that we can't ever know for sure has been really enlightening for me too.
Lindsay, our early trauma experiences - and our reactions to them - are similar. Hyper-vigilance and rescuing was how I coped too. I’ve been excavating my past, and familial patterns etc for five years now. It is important work! Thank you for writing about your experience.
Thank you Susan for sharing this with us. And it is long work, isn't it? Five years and counting, I imagine, but with every layer or story we peel away, we gain such a deeper understanding and joy in life too.
Yes, definitely. Digging deeper to become lighter - lighter in spirit and heart. I said five years, but that's just the latest period, I began excavating my past in my early 20's. It's been a lifetime of work and the work of a lifetime.
Such a great piece “writing is a medicine” - quite!
It truly is. I don't know where I would be without it.
Thank you for sharing this. I love Lindsay’s writing, it is always so considered, self-aware, deeply thought-provoking and yet comforting too. Thank you both! xx
You've put it so well -- considered and thought-provoking and comforting too. Thank you for commented Lyndsay and I'm so glad you enjoyed it.
This is so beautiful and lovely to read how healing writing can be from Lindsay 💛
Thank you Kate, writing is indeed so potent when it comes to healing ourselves ❤
I love Lindsay's work around memoir and mental health, so important to give our stories space. Really enjoyed this and totally agree about the benefits of writing and re-shaping the stories we tell ourselves. A powerful practice. A beautiful piece, thank you for giving it space here, Tamzin!
Thanks so much Charlene, it's such a pleasure for me to host fellow writers on here, especially the self-aware, compassionate ones! Really glad you enjoyed the piece 😍
First of all Tamzin, thank you for letting Lindsay share this piece.
There's so much to unpack and reflect on here. I realize that I can't live without my own stories, but at the same time I know that they are not based in any kind of objective reality. That's why when Lindsay wrote "when we are in a story, it can be so hard to see, objectively, whether it’s helping or hindering us" it really struck a chord with me. The narratives that I've told myself have given me purpose and motivation, but at the same time, In retrospect I can also see the pain and suffering that they had inflicted on loved ones.
I know that's a lot to unload here. But stories are very volatile with the potential to both build and destroy. I applaud Lindsay for being able to step outside and reveal both the healing as well as the harm that they are capable of.